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Absolute Steel
March 2006
Released: 2005, Black Lotus Records
Rating: 4.0/5
Reviewer: Waspman

Norway. Mostly known as a melodic black metal haven, the country hasn’t really made a mark in the traditional metal scene. Well, the five lads in Absolute Steel are on a “serious” mission to change all that, with their second full-length, WOMANIZER. You’ll note the word serious in the previous sentence was in brackets – this is intentional, ‘cause Absolute Steel have their collective tongue FIRMLY planted in cheek. See, these fellows fancy themselves a party band, and their songs are a true reflection of that ethic – just look at the titles!

So, knowing that the lyrics are either going to be hilarious or atrocious (they’re both), the music is what will make or break this album. Have no fear, ‘cause all worries will be blown away the second the main riff of “High Heels and Fishnet Stockings” kicks in – catchy as hell, and sounding like its been ripped straight out of 1985, the song is a melodic metal tour de force. K2’s vocals are appropriately high-pitched and fit for screaming while guitarists Andy Boss and Dave Bomb have got the twin-lead guitar god thing down pat.

By the time “Beerrun” and “Kick” are done, you’ll either be on board or throwing the CD across the room in disgust. ‘80s cliché after ‘80s cliché are shamelessly trotted out – predictable lyrical rhymes, heard-it-before riffage, gang vocals in the choruses, Absolute Steel have it all. Don’t get me wrong though – I fucking love it! The music is so damn catchy; you can’t help but love it. Even the cheesy ballads are lovable in that nostalgic way. Seriously, take one listen to “Juicy Lucy” – if you’re not amused, you suck. Of course, I would have preferred it if the band didn’t close the album with two instrumentals, but the rest more than makes up for that.

Personally, I believe Absolute Steel has to be one of the most talented bands around. Why? Because they have to be to pull off such ludicrous material! A near-perfect party album.
Track Listing

1) High Heels and Fishnet Stockings
2) Beerrun
3) Kick
4) Rough Love (Tender Heart)
5) Deeper
6) Juicy Lucy
7) Too Slow Above
8) Deliverance
9) Opus Suite


K2: Vocals
Dave Bomb: Lead Guitars, Backing Vocals
Any Boss: Lead Guitars, Backing Vocals
Dr. Schmutz: Bass, Backing Vocals
Rick Hagan: Drums, Backing Vocals

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