Interview with Lords Of The Trident

March 5th, 2014
by J P

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Interview with Lords Of The Trident

by JP

As this is our first chat with Lords Of The Trident, we must ask you the most obvious and predictable questions first! How did you choose the bands name and is there any significance to it?

You know, that question comes up a decent amount, and unfortunately, the story is rather ho-hum. You see, when we had formed our unholy metal alliance, we were struggling to come up with a name that would truly encompass the incredible, overwhelming, face-melting metal we produce. Many various names were suggested, but all were shot down. Or axed down. So, after a long night of battling each other, we decided to have a drink. That turned into a few kegs. Inebriated, we decided to visit the Oracle at Delphi to ask her advice. We drunkenly fell into the Oracle’s tent and slurred our question. In her drugged haze, she screamed “LORDS OF THE TRIDENT UNITE!” So we went with that. And after the first few battles, we removed the “unite” part, because it was far too long. So – significance? Not much, really. We (and the Oracle) just think it sounds cool.

Describe your sound to someone who has never heard you before!

We are the most metal band to have ever existed. The most metal band on earth. Take everything you love about all styles of metal, put it into one of those Ron Popeil juicers, set the juicer to SHRED, and have yourself a hearty glass of FACE-MELTING METAL! Our metal’s so pure that only diamonds can scratch it, and usually the diamonds are the ones that end up getting hurt in the end. Our amps are so loud, Manowar knocked on our door and asked us to “please turn down”. Don’t let your girlfriends near the LORDS, ’cause our music is guaranteed to make panties explode. You think you’re bad? While you’re watching our sweep picking wondering how we bend space-time to fit all the notes in, we’ll punch you right in the face without missing a beat. Many have equated our sound to Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Savatage, etc. with a tinge of modern metal influences. However, since we pre-date all of these bands, it’s more like they’re doing an homage to us, honestly!

Tell us a bit about your background and formation.

Well, if you want the entire epic tale – and quite a tale it is – you can find our biography on our website: www.LordsOfTheTrident.com, under the “Bio” section. But I’ll try to paraphrase the Homer-esque Odyssey that lives on the website. I, Fang VonWrathenstein, the lead singer, was born at the beginning of time when a volcano containing metal and steel exploded. I have thus far spent my immortal existence searching for other immortals who are worthy to produce the purest METAL known to man. Our lineup had stayed pretty steady for a couple hundred years, but lately we’ve been losing members and gaining new ones due to the fact that we’re constantly hunted by a shadowy international corporation or military force (I’m still unsure of which) called SPIDR. We recently lost our drummer, Sledge Garrotte, in an attack in West Virginia on tour. We’ve since replaced him with our touring drummer from our 1342 European “Black Plague” tour – Dr. Dante Vitus. We’re looking forward to getting back out on tour and introducing the surgical precision that the good doctor brings to the table.

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What is the Metal scene like at the bottom of the volcano and caves from whence you were spawned (aka Wisconsin)?

Well now, first off I must correct your question. You see, I wasn’t spawned in Wisconsin originally. The area where I “grew up” sort of pre-dates countries and even continents in some fashions of thinking, so I couldn’t exactly tell you specifically where I’m from, at least originally. We eventually made our way to Wisconsin after a series of events in early 2008 when the band re-formed after our 600-ish-year hiatus after the disastrous “Black Plague” tour. Again – apologies to Europe. The whole “free rat with purchase of ticket” thing that our dumbass publicist at the time came up with was a total bust. We had NO IDEA that those rats were carrying disease. So, yeah – our bad. Anyway – we had moved down into the Mohorovičić discontinuity (13 miles beneath the earth’s crust) in Wisconsin due to a number of reasons, but mostly because it prevents earthquakes from happening when we practice. There was a pretty disastrous event when Pontifex broke his bass string last time. (Apologies to Japan about the whole “tsunami” thing.)

Ah – but you were asking about the metal scene! My bad. As of late, things have been slowly improving, but for a long time we were mostly surrounded with death and nu-metal in Wisconsin…and most of it was, well, pretty bad. There were some diamonds in the rough, however. Some bands who were worthy to battle with. However, it seems that our reformation and various battles all over the country have inspired some like-minded bands to form, and we’re seeing quite a resurgence in our style of metal (or, I should say, the ORIGINAL style of metal).

The artwork for your latest EP, PLAN OF ATTACK is really wicked. It seems to be a step up from the previous couple of albums. Who did the artwork?

Yes – we think so too! We found this amazing Greek artist – Andreas Zafiratos – and we tasked him with the gargantuan task of creating a worthy album cover for us. Needless to say, he hit it out of the park. Not only is his art INCREDIBLE, but he is one of those rare artists who is incredibly responsive on email. Those are incredibly hard to find, so we’ll be going with him for our next album cover.

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Have you been shopping your albums around to record labels or are you content with releasing your albums independently?

We’ve had some inquiries in terms of signing us with some record labels, but to be perfectly honest, many are simply out to get a cut of the pie without much compensation in return. Gone are the days of the gold-plated-shark-tank-bars…now, we’re lucky if we come home from tour with some gold in our pockets. As it stands right now, we have excellent MP3 distribution on the internet, and if you want the physical copies (as many Minions do), it’s a simple task to order a copy from our website. It’s hard to tell exactly what a label would do for us, besides the name recognition of “being on a label”. Maybe some day, when we’re making decent gold on the road, we may consider it. As of right now, we’re happy to be independent.

In an extremely competitive market how important is image these days?

Incredibly important!! So many bands forget that they’re playing a show – and there’s a reason they call it a show! You need to SHOW something. If I had a nickel for every band I’ve seen in jeans and a black t-shirt, I’d have…well…at least $50. And I couldn’t tell one band from another. Having a decent image to pull you apart from all the “other” bands out there is very, very important. Now, it just so happened that for us, this process is rather organic, as we wear our armor everywhere we go. But as most of the other bands are simply mortals, most do not wear armor. We, however, have to be ready for a sneak attack at any time, so it’s 24/7.

In a related question, there is the concept of ‘listening with your eyes’. Do you feel that some fans may dismiss you based on image alone, instead of actually listening to the music?

Absolutely. There have been many times where we’ve come out to laughter, even to booing from people who’ve never seen us before. However, once that first song gets going, we quickly turn that into frantic headbanging from even the most stoic metalhead. Some have even committed seppuku to save their honor after initially booing us. It makes for some awkward cleanup for the club, though, so we’d prefer if the fans would leave the killing to us.

Is it significantly harder to play in character or in costume?

We get this “in character” and “costume” question a lot. As stated earlier, this is NOT a costume – it’s our battle armor. Try to force a dagger through this! Go ahead! You’ll notice it won’t budge. We’ve had many a scenario where a hidden assassin would shoot an arrow at us from a darkened club room, and let me tell you, I’m quite glad that I was wearing this armor at the time. Is it harder to move around in armor? Sure, a little, but when you’ve worn it as long as I have, you get quite used to it. And many of the maidens out there find it incredibly sexy.

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I love the humour, in your presentation. Do you feel that ‘Metal’ as a whole can get too serious? It is a serious claim to be the ‘Most METAL band on Earth!’

Hey, if you can’t laugh or make fun of the things you love, then you’re taking things far too seriously. I mean, I LOVE my axe. I’ve even named her. But do I joke about my axe? Absolutely. If you can’t have a little fun from time to time while you’re melting faces, then what’s the point? Some bands and fans take metal in general too seriously – they need to lighten up, and smile through the bloodshed.

What is next for Lords Of The Trident? Do you plan to destroy mankind, or just enslave us all?

Well, if we destroyed you, that would hurt our album sales and show attendance, so I think we’re happy just to be known as the most incredible band that mankind has ever heard or seen. The next step is just to continue our conquest until every mortal on earth has been witness to the truest METAL they have ever experienced. After a 600-year hiatus, most of your diehard fans are just dead fans…so in a sense, we’ve had to start rebuilding from scratch. We’re currently planning on heading back into the studio to release our 4th album (well, 5th if you count our Christmas EP), and get back on the road. We’ve got a tour planned this June, and another possible tour this November.

Use this last space to spread your propaganda, hypocrisy and lies to us mere mortals.

Everyone should go to our main website – www.LordsOfTheTrident.com – and educate themselves on their new METAL overlords – the LORDS OF THE TRIDENT! While you’re there, pick up something from our store, or purchase our album online. We’re on iTunes, Amazon, and everywhere else on the entire internet. Check out our music videos on YouTube, and share them with your friends! And don’t forget to make your fandom “Facebook official” by liking our page on Facebook!

Do this, and when we rampage through your village, we may spare you and your family. Fail to do this, and this I can guarantee: when your village burns to ashes around you, the last sight you will see in this mortal life will be my axe quickly approaching your skull!

So kids – make the right decision! STAY METAL!!!

COMPLETE CONTROL:

FACE OF THE ENEMY (Plot):

FACE OF THE ENEMY (Live):

CHAINS OF FIRE:

 

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