It has always been Metal’s inherent objective to dominate all life on the planet. A perfect world could exist if Metal ruled all forms of culture; entertainment, fashion, art, media, television, radio, film, newspapers, magazines and of course music. An important and effective technique to achieve this noble goal is to enslave the young. By indoctrinating the youth into ‘the Metal way’ is to ensure the future success of our utopian dream. One the most recent weapons in our glorious struggle is the band Hevisaurus.
Hevisaurus is essentially a Heavy Metal band for kids. This is brilliant. If we can get the kids hooked on Metal from very early will have a whole new generation while with ideals and goals of our Metal forefathers. Founded in Finland, this band dresses in dinosaur costumes and plays Heavy Metal. I kid you not. Think Barney on crack times five. Hevisaurus is the brainchild of Mirka Rantanen of Thunderstone and a bunch of Power Metal dudes from bands like Sonata Arctica and Stratovarius. RAYH! is the name of their 3rd album full-length album, which came out in September, 2011 followed shortly by the Christmas album, RAYHALLISTA JOULUA. This is great concept because most parents don’t pay attention to watch their kids watch or listen to anyway so by the time they figure out what Hevisarus is actually Metal, it’s will be too late. Little Sally and little Billy will be hooked on Metal for life and skipping down the road to rock holding hands with the devil.
The music is, as is perhaps expected from the participants, simple and effective Euro-Metal with super catchy songs and many sing-along anthems. There is a whole back-story and each dinosaur character has his personality role such as Riffi Raffi (get it?) as lead guitarosaur. The band is fronted by Frontosaur; Mr. Herra Hevisaurus on vocals. The music is actually very competent and melodic Metal, very clean, lots of keyboards with a big bright production…kinda like TSO. There are lots of big gang choruses and sing-along parts for the kids. I’m already singing along with the record and I don’t speak Finnish.
They sing in Finnish so I have no idea what they are talking about but it must be hilarious because Hevisaurus is enormously popular in their native Finland. What are essentially children’s albums, on a major label no less, went into the Top 10 on their domestic charts. From a marketing perspective Hevisaurus is actually very clever. Think of the merchandising potential with not one but five characters. There are videos, concerts, colouring books, magazines, the whole nine-yards. Already the big money is on board and with big money comes big trouble. A dispute erupted between members and record labels and a spin-off band called Sauruxet has already emerged.
Marketing and history aside, RAYH! is actually a very fun, little album. Good songs, great musicianship, good solos, strip away the costumes (kinda like Kiss, Lordi or GWAR) and you have some great songs. I’m afraid that some of the serious Metal fans may not be able to see past the image and costumes and not give the band a fair shake.
Kids these days don’t know how good they have it. When I was a kid all we had was Sharon Lois and Bram. Today as responsible parents who want to raise their children ‘the Metal way’, can buy this for their kids and get them into Metal in a very early age. It’s waaay better to be stuck into the car with your kid listening to Hevisarus than having to be subjected to Raffi or Barney or Penner over and over and over and over and over and over and over until you want to crash into the nearest tree just to end the mental anguish. At least Hevisaurus is Metal. Do your part for the cause. Buy a kid a Hevisaurus album today.
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